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Wednesday, October 01, 2003
Bush Staff Examines Records in Leak Probe
Attorney General John Ashcroft ruled out use of the FBI Ouija board employed in the investigation into the assassination of Martin Luther King. Instead, agents will be instructed to �pray really hard� for clues.
When asked if there were plans to press potential witnesses, Mr. Ashcroft replied, "Not at this time". He added that under the proposed PATRIOT II act, that practice would be permissable. At that point, presidential advisor Karl Rove gave what was later described as a "soul-curdling" hiss. Rove then turned into a black cat and leapt out an open window.
The Ouija board is believed to be in use by US armed forces in Iraq, although this could not be confirmed before press time.
bmarkey 10/01/2003 09:27:00 PM