The Big Green House

Friday, April 11, 2003

 

Cranky pants are ON

I had to go downtown this morning, in order to get some paperwork squared away so that we can get Science Girl covered by my insurance. (By the way, the bullshit hoops they�re making us jump through in order to prove that we are indeed �domestic partners� are not to be believed. Most married couples I know couldn�t satisfy all the requirements.) Now I remember why I don�t go downtown more often: too goddamn many humans! Butt ugly ones, too. I know most people are stupid, I expect that, but when did the ugly start?

I seriously wanted to throw myself in front of a passing bus just to stop the assault on my senses, but traffic was so backed up that none of the busses were going more than 5 mph. The best I could have hoped for would have been a bruise, and who needs more of those? Instead, I had lunch & a pint (shhh!) at the Pike Place Pub. It, too, was crammed to the rafters with the creepy peoples, but at least I was able to get me some decent food and, most importantly, life-sustaining alcohol. Were it not for our friend Mr. Booze you would surely be seeing me on the news tonight, and not in a happy context.

Sadly, I had to stop at one pint, since I still had to go to work. This left me woefully unprepared for the herd of 8-year-olds, all of whom had apparently lost the use of their �indoors voice�, returning from a fieldtrip on the bus that went by my place of employment. Now, don�t get me wrong; I really like kids, individually. It�s when you get large groups of them in confined spaces that I have trouble. Their tiny, piercing voices were like so many red-hot knitting needles shoved into my poor, over-taxed brain. Oddly enough, they got off at the same stop I did. I had a brief moment of unbearable panic when I thought they were actually going to follow me in to work (which would have made absolutely no sense, but I was rattled enough by this point to succumb to any fear that popped into my head, no matter how groundless � had someone suggested that we were about to be attacked by newts the size of ponies, I would have run off in search of newt-repellant), but fortunately they continued on their (noisy) way past the front door.

So, here I am, at my workplace, down to my last nerve. And only seven hours to go!

bmarkey 4/11/2003 04:59:00 PM