The Big Green House

Tuesday, March 11, 2003

 

Things I have learned

Small dogs will eat remarkably large amounts of the following, if accidentally permitted to do so: roasted, salted cashews; sharp cheddar cheese; smoked oysters. These same small dogs will spend the better part of the next several days regretting that they�d ever come in contact with the aforementioned foods.

The scent of lilies, which so many people find intoxicating, causes me to experience fairly severe nausea and headache. I�m not fooling. My employers get a bouquet for our workplace from a local florist every week, and they�re usually pretty good about leaving out the stinkier flowers. This week they forgot, so I�ve been fighting to keep my lunch down every day. I even moved them across the room and still the stench was overpowering. I finally had to get the official OK from my boss to toss the nasty things. Oh, and ditto on paperwhites, if you were thinking of sending me flowers.

When chopping fiery hot chiles, do not rub your eye. If you accidentally do rub your eye, (even though you were just thinking �Don�t rub your eye�), when you rinse your eye in running water be sure to tilt your head so that the water does not run into your other eye. I learned these two valuable lessons at the same time I learned that adding raisins to shrimp curry is actually pretty tasty.

And unless you know for a fact that a woman is pregnant, do not, under any circumstances, ask when her due date is.




bmarkey 3/11/2003 07:23:00 PM